Pundarik Dham/Bangladesh

On the 24th of November I took a domestic flight from Dhaka to Chittagong.
The devotees received me at the small airport and took me straight to Pundarik Dham - a two-hours' drive.

I was scheduled to conduct a three-day Holy Name Retreat, with around 260 devotees taking part. The group was actually a little took large - I usually set the limit of 150 devotees, and the local devotees had raised it to 200, but now 260 devotees had assembled. Many had come from surrounding yatras, and since we had not offered a retreat for a couple of years they were especially eager to participate and deepen their relationship with the Holy Name.
The local devotees arranged everything very nicely - Pundarik Dham gives the perfect setting for such kind of retreats: it is a holy dham with Sri Sri Varsabhanavi-Murari being the Lords of the establishment, and it is in seclusion, with lush and green surroundings making the mind and senses calm.
Once again, the retreat was a wonderful and deep experience for everyone who participated sincerely. I always especially value the deep and prayerful evening kirtans, where we try and apply what we had discussed during the day. Even as a fulltime traveling preacher I find myself in the situation where I don't have enough kirtan in my life! Our usual disease is that we are always too busy, and maybe we are also sometimes lacking opportunities to participate in deep and prayerful kirtans.

Some time ago Yadubara Prabhu shared a little Prabhupada story with me: Prabhupada was in Mayapur during the Gaur Purnima festival, and Yadubara Prabhu was in his room with him. In the temple room downstairs was a loud and passionate kirtan going on, becoming faster and faster. Finally it came to an end. Srila Prabhupada turned to Yadubara Prabhu and commented: "Good! He has finished.....!"

It gives some little insights what Srila Prabhupada had to tolerate....! And at the same time he must have been glad that "at least" they are trying to chant Hare Krishna. Prabhupada could not give all insights in those early days - we were not ready for it! Even though he did explain so many things about chanting. But it seemed to have taken so many years for us to understand them - at least for my humble self....
In 1969 Srila Prabhupada explains in a lecture: "So we are addressing, Hare Krsna, Hare Krsna: 'O energy of the Lord, O Lord, please accept me'. That's all. 'Please accept me.' We have no other prayer. 'Please accept me.' Lord Caitanya taught that we should simply cry, and we shall simply pray for accepting us. That's all. So this vibration is simply a cry for addressing the Supreme Lord, requesting Him, 'Please accept me. Please accept me".
This is not only in japa, but also in kirtan.

One realization struck me on this retreat: it is not only our mind which is distracting us during chanting, but it is also our false ego, which is always rambling on and demanding some satisfaction. Sometimes we find ourselves engaged in all kinds of ego battles and discussions on the platform of the mind, which are instigated by the false ego - our constant companion and troublemaker. Therefore Mahaprabhu says: "trnad api sunicena -
one can chant the holy name of the Lord in a humble state of mind...." Unless we do this internal work of subduing and dissolving the false ego, it is indeed very difficult to chant the holy name. We can imagine a large throne within our heart, which is actually meant for Ksna to take His seat there. But at this moment our big false ego has occupied it, and thus we cannot offer this asana to Krsna. The process of Krsna consciousness is meant to push this well fed false ego off the throne, so that Krsna can take His seat there. This is not an easy task and requires introspection and deep, sincere and constant endeavor, with great determination.

We concluded our retreat with the vision of establishing Pundarik Dham as a transcendental Cardiology Center, where we assemble once a year for a serious heart check-up and heart surgery. When I proposed this vision to my audience, I turned to Cinmoy Prabhu, the temple president, and asked: "Prabhuji, do you like this idea?" He happily agreed, while another temple president cheekily exclaimed: "He will be the first patient!" Needless to say, everyone burst out into laughter.....
Next year we are planning to have a three-day retreat on the topic of "The False Ego - Our Constant Companion and Troubelmaker." Unless we learn to consciously work on subduing our false ego, we cannot really get on deeper levels of chanting. Whatever benefit we receive is once again spoiled and poisened through "ego-driven" behavior - it is like the elefant throwing sand on his back after he has taken his bath. Both endeavors have to go on parallel - chanting the holy name and cultivating a genuine and selfless service attitude, free from the influence of the false ego.

​After the retreat I stayed for two more days in Pundarik Dham. One day we had a sweet evening kirtan in a small room - just big enough to pack in all the temple devotees. It was a very sweet and intimate atmosphere, and everyone chanted with heart and soul, filling the entire room with transcendental sound....

The next evening we conducted a class for the temple devotees on the topic of prajalpa. I felt this topic was a direct follow-up of the Holy Name Retreat, since prajalpa destroys the echo the holy name is carrying, and immediately switches on the mundane mind. We discussed the various forms of prajalpa which Bhaktivinoda Thakur mentions in his book Bhaktyaloka. A lively question-and-answer sesssion followed.....

On the 29th of November I traveled back to Chittagong.....

Your servant, Devaki dd